What a gorgeous sunny morning here on the prairies! The breeze is brisk but all I feel through my dining room window is the warmth of the sun hanging in that beautiful blue sky!
I have a very full mind today. I feel like it will burst if I don't get this out! So today might be a long one - get a cup of coffee...you know I've got one! Get comfy.
Here we go...
There is an issue that I am struggling with that I have been trying desperately to ignore. But, like an annoying fly, it keeps finding me and coming back! Finally, it's time to haul out the fly swatter and DEAL. This is where the similarity ends. A quick "thwack" of the swatter makes short order of that fly. The 'issue'? Not so much. I only wish it were that simple.
The issue has a name.
SELF-CONTROL
I know you want to click 'close' right now, but please don't! What God showed me this morning in my time with Him truly stunned me.
A little rewind:
In spring my ladies bible study group began a study called "Living Beyond Yourself" by...yep, you guessed it - Beth Moore. It was a study that unpacked Galatians 5:22-23; the fruit of the spirit. The very last fruit to deal with was...right again - self-control.
Fast-forward to about a week ago.
On three separate occasions within a week, three of my friends approached me about being their accountability in specific areas of their life where they felt completely out of control. They were ALL the same area. Though we are all friends, none knew about each others request for help. Each request came in the same vehicle - humble, repentant, and dare I say, mildly embarrassed about what God had not only asked them to deal with, but the fact they were to confess it to someone else!
Here is the worst part - none of them knew how deeply I was struggling at this particular time with this EXACT same issue!Oh my! I cried out to God "they have no idea what they are asking of me! I am so weak! I am so embarrassed! I am SOOOOO NOT doing this!"... cuz then I'd have to reveal my own struggle!
As I talked with each friend it became clear that while I was saying NO,No,NO; God was saying YES,YES,YES! Seeing as three of us are in the same ladies group (the fourth is a full-time career woman, but she's in our group in spirit!), it didn't take long for us to realize we were all in the same boat; no paddle!
James 5:16 "Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed."
Confession time for me! Yep, I'm struggling too. I am weak in this - affirmative! I need help too - resounding AMEN on that one!
The first friend who approached me pointed me back to the "self-control week" of the the study we had done back in spring.
The more we talked and prayed about this, the more we were led back to Beth's study.
It outlined two main themes for me.
1) Are you going to live like Daniel, or like Samson?
How each of them lived their lives is vastly different.
Daniel's life is lived out in a calm, peaceful, well outlined method([?] There's a better word than method, but i can't think of it right now) When you read Daniel, keep in mind, the circumstances surrounding him were anything but! He was in a furnace, officials and leaders plotted to kill him and he kept the lions company for one night!
Samson, on the other hand...His story is one violent R-rated flick from beginning to end! It would definately be a box-office hit in today's world! He is hap-hazzard, disrespectful, crude, rude and self-serving. When you read about Samson's life in Judges, remember that God had set him apart; just like Daniel. God still used Samson in spite of himself, but just as he had lived, he came to a violent end. There is much evidence in Samson's story that God gives him more than one chance to get it together.
Now we know that if God has set us apart - and He has(!) then He will use us no matter if we look like Samson or Daniel. The question is, (drum roll please) WHAT DO YOU WANT IT TO LOOK LIKE?
God already did His part. He said he was going to use you. The rest is up to you. Self-control.
But what if you have no concept of self-control or how to apply it? What if you're in such a tailspin already that you see no way out?
It's kinda like being in that boat without the paddle....
As you are headed for the rapids, you're not sure if a paddle would help even if you had one! Someone on the shoreline sees what is about to happen and thows you a paddle. Ok! Now what?!?!!! How do you apply it so you can navigate your way out of the rapids? If you had learned how to use a paddle in the first place; way back when the waters were still calm, the rapids wouldn't seem so threatening to you and you would have gotten through it just fine. As it is now, you're headed for a wreakage - paddle or not! (Anyone see Samson in this?)
That brings me to theme #2)
Rebuilding your wall.
What?! How did we get from the water to the wall?!!! Well, there's no water in this scripture, so we had to change gears! LOL
What are walls? Boundaries. Walls keep things in and out.
"Any person without self-control is either an accident looking for a place to happen (the boat?) or a slave in chains." -Beth Moore
"Without self-control, we are like a city with broken down walls! To understand the significance of such a terrible dilema we must remember a crucial characteristic af ancient architecture: a city was only as secure as the walls which surrounded it. A city's walls were it's fortification." -Beth Moore
The scripture is Nehemiah 2.
He is so saddened that Jerusalem lays in ruins. He wants to rebuild the walls so that the enemy will not take this city again.
When I think about that, I see my walls have holes big enough for satan AND his hooligans to drive tanks through! Clearly, I need some repairs. Hmm...so how am I going to do this?
Nehemiah is one man. The city's walls need much more than that! Not to mention, there is opposition and ridicule all around him. Not a lot of chance for success, is there? But God says in
2 Corinthians 12:9 to Paul, "...My power is made perfect in your weakeness."
Long before Paul ever walked the earth, long before Jesus came as both God and flesh, Nehemiah claimed God's strenth and boldy proclaimed "The God of heaven will give us success!" (Neh. 2:20)
Notice he says 'us'? I said he was only one man. Nehemiah enlisted the help of others to rebuild this wall.
Remember the requests of my crazy friends? That's what they did! They sought my help and God has promised success! Remember I said that I was not in any shape to be helping anyone? If Nehemiah could claim God's perfect strength long before Paul's struggles, then surely I can claim it long after! God provided all four of us friends with His strength in the form of each other; all struggling with the same holes in our walls and the same weaknesses. THAT is the God I know and love so well!
Well, as stunning as that all is to me, there is more to it if you can belive that! This whole thing lines up directly with the re-building of our farm. I didn't see it till this morning after I asked God how following Him through this Self-control thing had anything to do with our current state of affairs. Cuz frankly, I just don't have it in me to deal with more than this crisis!
True to form, He answered and amazed me. I'll post more about that answer another time.
Flipping further ahead in Nehemiah, it says this upon completion of the wall:
"When all our enemies heard about this, all the surrounding nations were afraid and lost their self-confidence, because they realized that this work had been done with the help of our God."
Neh. 6:16
Let's get stared on that wall girls, so we can be a little more "Daniel" about things!
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Tell No Lies!
True to typical prairie weather fashion, yesterday started out gray enough, but by noon the brilliant blue skies had chased away the gloom...
Right into the core of my being! Remember those sentiments of homey sweat home? Well, what greeted my girls when they walked in yesterday was a little closer to SCARY! My oldest daughter saw fit to set me straight-
"I really hate it when you're grumpy!"
"And do you think I like it?!" I charged back in my 'mom' voice. (Intelligent, huh?)
What I really wanted to know was, what happened to the warm fuzzy stuff I had blogged about so much earlier that day?!!!!!!! Even my husband shook his head and was sorry that he hadn't signed some sort of mood wavier on our wedding day!
(Girls, if anyone ever comes up with something like that, once a month we are ALL in trouble! LOL)
That led me to thinking:
anyone anywhere can post whatever-the-heck they want to on the internet. We actually have no reason to believe what other people talk about on the news, talk shows or the world-wide-web, not to mention the send-this-to-10-friends-and-good-things-will-happen e-mails!
The end of my day yesterday had no resemblance what-so-ever to my post. So did I lie? Did I make it all up?
Nope. Not a lick. All true.
First of all, it takes way too much time and energy to make it up! That is not to say though, that the media doesn't like to spice up news stories, and talk shows have to ham it up cuz they want us to watch! But for me, personally, I'm just not all that imaginative!
So if you can't trust the news completely (the weather alone turns a newscaster into a liar!) and talk shows...well, somehow there's always another show about what "REALLY" happened behind the scenes or the internet - I could have NOT confessed the end-of-day events....
Then what is true?
Jesus. The Word.
It is the one true thing.
It's what makes the stuff of life true to form, even if the day looks more like a rollercoaster ride!
So here is my goal for today:
To redeem myself today when the girls get home.
Oh, and the One True thing is also what forgives.
.....I just hope the girls can forget too, cuz that was flat out ugly!
Right into the core of my being! Remember those sentiments of homey sweat home? Well, what greeted my girls when they walked in yesterday was a little closer to SCARY! My oldest daughter saw fit to set me straight-
"I really hate it when you're grumpy!"
"And do you think I like it?!" I charged back in my 'mom' voice. (Intelligent, huh?)
What I really wanted to know was, what happened to the warm fuzzy stuff I had blogged about so much earlier that day?!!!!!!! Even my husband shook his head and was sorry that he hadn't signed some sort of mood wavier on our wedding day!
(Girls, if anyone ever comes up with something like that, once a month we are ALL in trouble! LOL)
That led me to thinking:
anyone anywhere can post whatever-the-heck they want to on the internet. We actually have no reason to believe what other people talk about on the news, talk shows or the world-wide-web, not to mention the send-this-to-10-friends-and-good-things-will-happen e-mails!
The end of my day yesterday had no resemblance what-so-ever to my post. So did I lie? Did I make it all up?
Nope. Not a lick. All true.
First of all, it takes way too much time and energy to make it up! That is not to say though, that the media doesn't like to spice up news stories, and talk shows have to ham it up cuz they want us to watch! But for me, personally, I'm just not all that imaginative!
So if you can't trust the news completely (the weather alone turns a newscaster into a liar!) and talk shows...well, somehow there's always another show about what "REALLY" happened behind the scenes or the internet - I could have NOT confessed the end-of-day events....
Then what is true?
Jesus. The Word.
It is the one true thing.
It's what makes the stuff of life true to form, even if the day looks more like a rollercoaster ride!
So here is my goal for today:
To redeem myself today when the girls get home.
Oh, and the One True thing is also what forgives.
.....I just hope the girls can forget too, cuz that was flat out ugly!
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Survival On The Prairies
Brrrr.....Living on the prairies makes me think we happen to live in the shopping mecca of the world! I know, I can see you all raising your eyebrows to this.
Think about it: Where else do you need to plan your new house around the CLOSET!?!! Where else does this particular closet need to be the BIGGEST room in your house!?! Where else do you need SIX seasons of clothing!?!!!! Yes, SIX - Summer, gorgeous autumn, icy autumn, winter, mushy spring and blooming spring. See. Six.
My parents-in-law; bless their hearts, are already dreading the inevitable winter to come. They have decided to stay in doors at all costs, find a grocery delivery service and in effect, go stir-crazy! I will let you know in spring how this has all worked out for them!
My parents, on the other hand, are headed to for Belize for 2 weeks. They are leaving next week. My dear little sister and her family are on a 6 month mission there. My brother-in-law is teaching in a school there. I am so glad it is only 6 months because even with all this wonderful technology the world sometimes feels just too big.
Well, given these icy prairie winds, my parents may decide not to come back till the mercury comes out of hiding from below that zero! There would be much wisdom in that!!! LOL
It is surely a very gray day today. The leaves are all gone, leaving no shelter from the incoming cold. The clouds are steely with the promise of snow. The barn blends well into this cold picture - on many levels.
It's gray. It's cold. It's empty.
Only the dormant winter lays ahead.
If I would let it, this entire picture could send me right back to bed! But it won't. There is victory! In no way is this picture a reflection of what God's eternal promises are. One of my favorite verses is:
Psalm 20:7
Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we...I trust in the name of the Lord our...MY God.
I am not going to put my trust in the things around me that I can see. Snow-filled clouds, the cavernous gray building and my big closet with jackets galore busting out of it are all tangibles. GOD is so much bigger that all of this. There is nothing that cannot be overcome in the name of the Lord MY God.
God our Father wants to give us good things. We might not be the recipients of it here on this huge ball of dirt, but if we look hard, there is some evidence of it here....
I don't like cold, but I love the snow. Living in this shopping mecca? Well, who doesn't love shopping?! Making everyone bundle up to head out the door in the morning is nothing short of a chore. But having them come blowing in at the end of the day to the sights and smells of home is such a blessing. I love those rosy cheeks!
...and one more thing. Coffee! Waking up to the smell of brewing coffee, inhaling the scent of a promising day and wrapping my hands around the warmth of my favorite mug...what more could you ask for!
When God made coffee, He had this prairie girl in mind!
And seeing as I need a little extra chutzpah this morning, I think I'll go brew another pot!
Think about it: Where else do you need to plan your new house around the CLOSET!?!! Where else does this particular closet need to be the BIGGEST room in your house!?! Where else do you need SIX seasons of clothing!?!!!! Yes, SIX - Summer, gorgeous autumn, icy autumn, winter, mushy spring and blooming spring. See. Six.
My parents-in-law; bless their hearts, are already dreading the inevitable winter to come. They have decided to stay in doors at all costs, find a grocery delivery service and in effect, go stir-crazy! I will let you know in spring how this has all worked out for them!
My parents, on the other hand, are headed to for Belize for 2 weeks. They are leaving next week. My dear little sister and her family are on a 6 month mission there. My brother-in-law is teaching in a school there. I am so glad it is only 6 months because even with all this wonderful technology the world sometimes feels just too big.
Well, given these icy prairie winds, my parents may decide not to come back till the mercury comes out of hiding from below that zero! There would be much wisdom in that!!! LOL
It is surely a very gray day today. The leaves are all gone, leaving no shelter from the incoming cold. The clouds are steely with the promise of snow. The barn blends well into this cold picture - on many levels.
It's gray. It's cold. It's empty.
Only the dormant winter lays ahead.
If I would let it, this entire picture could send me right back to bed! But it won't. There is victory! In no way is this picture a reflection of what God's eternal promises are. One of my favorite verses is:
Psalm 20:7
Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we...I trust in the name of the Lord our...MY God.
I am not going to put my trust in the things around me that I can see. Snow-filled clouds, the cavernous gray building and my big closet with jackets galore busting out of it are all tangibles. GOD is so much bigger that all of this. There is nothing that cannot be overcome in the name of the Lord MY God.
God our Father wants to give us good things. We might not be the recipients of it here on this huge ball of dirt, but if we look hard, there is some evidence of it here....
I don't like cold, but I love the snow. Living in this shopping mecca? Well, who doesn't love shopping?! Making everyone bundle up to head out the door in the morning is nothing short of a chore. But having them come blowing in at the end of the day to the sights and smells of home is such a blessing. I love those rosy cheeks!
...and one more thing. Coffee! Waking up to the smell of brewing coffee, inhaling the scent of a promising day and wrapping my hands around the warmth of my favorite mug...what more could you ask for!
When God made coffee, He had this prairie girl in mind!
And seeing as I need a little extra chutzpah this morning, I think I'll go brew another pot!
Sunday, October 26, 2008
THE Video
Just a little note on the Hoyt Team video:
This video was first shown to me this past summer as a bunch of my friends crowded around a computer desk in our host's pantry!
Backround: Six of us women ventured to a Beth Moore conference one weekend this past summer. On the way home, we had the privilege of staying in the home of the sister to one of my fantastic friends. It was the perfect cap to all we had taken in at the conference.
For those of you who are familiar with Beth Moore, there is nothing to say! For those of you who are not, I will say this...
GET FAMILIAR!!!
Find her book, find a study, watch her on "Life Today"...anything! You have got to get to know this anointed woman! If I knew how to link her to my blog, I would! So once I get that figured out, I'll let you know!
Anyway...the video...
This video stuns me because I'm not so sure I would have committed to that for my kid! (My next blog will be 'confessions of a prairie mom!' LOL) The song is so fitting too, because our Redeemer committed to SO MUCH MORE! It's ME riding along in that race. It's ME that my Redeemer is doing all that for! My race is much longer though. It's a lifetime.
As far as the handicaps go? I have plenty of them.
That video can be compared to (and in no way an I minimizing the severity of his handicap or the lengths that his father went through) so many area of our lives. Right now, my area just happens to be our "un-farm".
I see God carrying us through all of this and I love the smile Rick Hoyt has at the end.
I am looking forward to mirroring that smile!
Note: If you have any comments on this video, I'd love to hear them!
This video was first shown to me this past summer as a bunch of my friends crowded around a computer desk in our host's pantry!
Backround: Six of us women ventured to a Beth Moore conference one weekend this past summer. On the way home, we had the privilege of staying in the home of the sister to one of my fantastic friends. It was the perfect cap to all we had taken in at the conference.
For those of you who are familiar with Beth Moore, there is nothing to say! For those of you who are not, I will say this...
GET FAMILIAR!!!
Find her book, find a study, watch her on "Life Today"...anything! You have got to get to know this anointed woman! If I knew how to link her to my blog, I would! So once I get that figured out, I'll let you know!
Anyway...the video...
This video stuns me because I'm not so sure I would have committed to that for my kid! (My next blog will be 'confessions of a prairie mom!' LOL) The song is so fitting too, because our Redeemer committed to SO MUCH MORE! It's ME riding along in that race. It's ME that my Redeemer is doing all that for! My race is much longer though. It's a lifetime.
As far as the handicaps go? I have plenty of them.
That video can be compared to (and in no way an I minimizing the severity of his handicap or the lengths that his father went through) so many area of our lives. Right now, my area just happens to be our "un-farm".
I see God carrying us through all of this and I love the smile Rick Hoyt has at the end.
I am looking forward to mirroring that smile!
Note: If you have any comments on this video, I'd love to hear them!
You've Touched My Heart!
Thank you, thank you, thank you! Some of my dear friends have posted and some have expressed in person to me how they are enjoying this blog. It never occurred to me that my love of writing would come out on a blog. I keep a journal and when I give a card, I always write a little extra in there. Generally, that's the extent of it.
I suppose the real reason I started this is because, yes, I love to write, but also, when friends, family and acquaintances ask "how are you?" truly, how many people what the REAL answer! And if they do, well, give me three hours of your time, and I'll tell you! Not only that, I feel like such a broken record! There just seems to be so much I need to get out and this is a great outlet! Try it! I'd love to read your blogs too!
The thought too, had come to me that just maybe, God would find a way to use this blog for His glory. For kingdom building. Yesterday in church we sang a song that has the line:
"and the cry of my heat is to bring you praise from the inside out."
That song, among many, moves me to tears because if there is ONE thing that I get, it's that line. So often I pray, 'God, how is this going to glorify You? How is my life going to count for eternity in my four walls with my 3 girls and my husband that I have been entrusted with, here, in my little prairie community?'
And so, my new prayer is about this blog:
"Lord, I know that I'm writing primarily for me, but God, could you direct it to someone who needs to hear about YOU! Could You direct it to someone who can read through all my shortcomings and blogging blunders and see Your awesomeness? Please, please,please, let them see You and not me. Thank You for what You can do with all this amazing technology!"
...just found the spell check! Now I won't annoy those spelling freaks out there with my bumbling typing. See? Look what God does with all this technology! LOL
I suppose the real reason I started this is because, yes, I love to write, but also, when friends, family and acquaintances ask "how are you?" truly, how many people what the REAL answer! And if they do, well, give me three hours of your time, and I'll tell you! Not only that, I feel like such a broken record! There just seems to be so much I need to get out and this is a great outlet! Try it! I'd love to read your blogs too!
The thought too, had come to me that just maybe, God would find a way to use this blog for His glory. For kingdom building. Yesterday in church we sang a song that has the line:
"and the cry of my heat is to bring you praise from the inside out."
That song, among many, moves me to tears because if there is ONE thing that I get, it's that line. So often I pray, 'God, how is this going to glorify You? How is my life going to count for eternity in my four walls with my 3 girls and my husband that I have been entrusted with, here, in my little prairie community?'
And so, my new prayer is about this blog:
"Lord, I know that I'm writing primarily for me, but God, could you direct it to someone who needs to hear about YOU! Could You direct it to someone who can read through all my shortcomings and blogging blunders and see Your awesomeness? Please, please,please, let them see You and not me. Thank You for what You can do with all this amazing technology!"
...just found the spell check! Now I won't annoy those spelling freaks out there with my bumbling typing. See? Look what God does with all this technology! LOL
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