Pictures From Heaven

God is so gentle. He will do things, tell you things and move you only when you are ready. And just when you think no one could ever top your 'crap', God lets you know that He's seen it ALL! You are no surprise to Him and by the way, He's had thousands of years of experience in turning personal ships around!

Yesterday, for the first time, My husband and I went to Prayer Summit at our church. It is a night of prayer and worship. The sanctuary is strewn haphazardly with small clusters of people praying with each other.

Back in November, I had asked God to give me a picture or a word about where our farm stood in the grand scheme of things - and for that matter, where did I stand? It was a picture. There I was, in dark murky water, with a boat floating a few feet away from me. The boat looked safe enough, but I wasn't really drawn to it. What I really wanted, was to walk on the water. I didn't relish being in the water, but I was at peace with it. My footing was sure and I could sense that Jesus was with me.

Last night in prayer, God brought that picture back to me and I asked Him if it had changed any. It had. Still in the water, I looked at the boat and in a flash I saw our barns in it.
I cried. 'But God! How can they be in the boat, if I don't want the boat?!??? I want to walk on water...remember?!

There was more. The boat had a rope attached to the bow and it was being held taught somehow.

I shared with my prayer partners how I felt about my farm being in the safety of the boat; completely forgetting about the rope.

We went to prayer and my partners asked the Holy Spirit to reveal to them what He wanted me to know about this.

God revealed 2 things:
1. Our farm was ok. It wasn't going to go under, get washed up or fall apart.

Well, ok. God was telling me not to worry about it.
Truly, I hadn't realized that I had been worrying. It had not really occurred to me that He wasn't going to provide.....well, ok. there are times I do worry. It's tough to get my bookwork done when all I see is money going out and none coming in. The digits in my savings are dropping! Not to mention, I was pumping out resumes as fast as I could...with no results.

So yes, I was thankful for the reminder that our farm was safe on that dark, murky water.

....but my heart still cried out....ON the water God, on THE WATER God. On the water GOD!

Enter revelation #2.
Remember the rope that I had forgotten about? My friend looked at me and said this:

"There is a thick rope attached to the boat. If you cut the rope, and turn around, you will see clear water and a paradise island, with a dock...."

Can you say STUNNED?

My throat felt kinda thick. If I cut the rope, that means the boat will float away -

with my farm in it.

I didn't want the boat!
Um...I would be lying if I said I wasn't rethinking that right now.
...but then, there's that paradise island....

Safety of the boat vs. undiscovered, blissful paradise island. Yeah, I know. The choice looks like a no-brainer. If this were a book I was penning; someone else's life-adventure, I KNOW how I'd write the ending...bon voyage to the boat!

What God is Accomplishing in My Little Corner of the Prairies

When I was little, my favorite show on TV was "Little House on the Prairie." I still try to find it on the tube sometimes! I loved how every milestone, celebration, hardship, tragedy and weekly trek to their little church brought families and communities together.

Lately, I feel like I'm in my very own episode - sans over-sized dresses!!!!

I have asked God over the years to do a work in my family - my kids, my siblings and parents, and even wider spread, my mom's family.

Every time I went to God specifically for my husband and kids, God would ask me "Are you ready for the ride? Are you ready for what this will require of you!?" I was always quick to answer - of course!.....

Hmmm...
Well, here I am with one thing after another. It seems my still-empty farm is not enough and this hockey season has been worthy of prime-time Emmy awards, with more drama than I ever thought possible!

Here's the topper -
My mom has cancer. Breast cancer. She was diagnosed on New Year's Eve. The praise part would be that it is category 1; which is the lowest of the low. The part that is difficult is that no matter how minimal the cancer is, you still have to go through all the treatment...surgery, radiation and possibly chemo.

This is the first time I have put it in writing. It took a bit to talk about it too. Cancer. It's such an ugly word, and difficult to spit out. In a string of prayer request that I have shared over the years, I think the hardest thing to date, is to say is 'my mom has cancer.'

Here's what I do know -
I was NOT ready for the ride.

Here is the other thing I know -
I wouldn't change any of this for the world!
I have seen my kids grow in Christ. I have watched hockey parents change and come together and pray for our mini NHLers. I have had moments with my mom and my siblings that are only possible when Christ is the focus.

I hate the tragic parts, but I love what God does with them.